Ted and Heidi Cruz shared a weird ass soup story on CNN

By
Casey Dolan
-

During CNN’s town hall on Wednesday, Republican Presidential candidate, and face you just want to punch, Ted Cruz and his wife Heidi told a weird ass story about the day they got back home from their honeymoon, when Ted went to the store to buy 100 cans of gross, (“some chicken, some beef”) Campbell’s Chunky Soup.

Then, somehow, the story gets even weirder.

Heidi says:

So the next morning, it was a weekend morning, I loaded up our car before he woke up and returned every single can. And when I got home, I called my mother just to make sure I’d done the right thing as a newlywed. And she emphatically disagreed with me. And so when Ted opened the pantry, I had to quickly tell him that I would go back and buy those cans again.

Dafuq?

So many questions:

  • Was the soup just for Ted, or could Heidi have some too?
  • Was it 100 cans because Ted is an extreme couponer?
  • Did ya’ll get banned from the grocery store because you are so damn weird with your constant buying and returning of 100 cans of soup?
  • Dafuq?
  • Where do you store 100 cans?
  • If Ted is elected POTUS, will the school lunch menu only be soup?
  • Is this a normal thing for them as a couple?
  • Seriously, dafuq??
  • Was this the thing Ted was thinking about the entire honeymoon?
  • Are the White House chefs excited about how easy their jobs might be in a couple months?
  • Have these people never heard of Kraft Mac and Cheese?

That is just for starters.   Add your questions / answers in the comments below.

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