Welcome to Ask Clare, our advice column. Have a question, dilemma, or quandary? Send it to Clare in an email or on her Facebook page.
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Clare,
About two years ago, I went through a tough breakup. We were together nearly a decade and I thought I was done dating. Now when I meet someone and we start spending time together, I can’t help but get attached really quickly. Ultimately, I am pretty crushed when it doesn’t work out – even if we only went on a few dates. How can I move on from this?
– Down in the dumps
Down in the dumps,
Take a break from actively trying to find someone to be with. Focus on you Do what you want to do. Eat want you want to eat. Hell, go to a movie alone when you can. The more comfortable you are alone, the easier the end of these trysts will be. Try not to think about the future when you’re with someone new – enjoy the moment.
– Clare
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Clare,
There is a student at my son’s daycare that has special needs. I volunteer in the class once a week for an hour. The charming little kids can also be pretty disruptive. I think it is great that the little ones can learn to be accepting and kind to everyone but the ‘teachers’ there are not equipped to deal with the extra attention he requires. I know if I talk to them about it, I may look and feel like an awful human being.
– House husband
House husband,
Tread lightly and don’t mansplain. You’re in the class just an hour a week and probably don’t fully understand the class dynamic or the teachers’ capabilities. You’re in charge of where your kid goes to day care – not where other kids go to daycare.
– Clare
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Clare,
My friend and I decided to start a podcast about a year ago. At the time, it was exciting and fun. Now, it feels like a chore. Once we start recording, I am into it but it is something I dread having to make time for. I don’t want to let my friend and our very few listeners down but I also wouldn’t mind spending my spare time on other things that aren’t a commitment. Should I just stick it out? There is no end in sight and that really depresses me.
– Podcast pullout
Podcast pullout,
Tell your friend you want to talk about the future of this podcast project. Quitting something doesn’t mean it was a failure or waste of time. It’s better that than to drag it on till it suffers. See if a talk about ending it makes you feel better. You could also talk about doing the podcast less frequently. Your time is the most limited resource you have – spend it in a way that makes you happy and fulfills you.
– Clare
