Thanksgiving is almost here, *sigh*, and that means, *sigh*, the family is getting together and before you know it, *sigh*, someone is going to bring up politics *UGH!*. In order to avoid the awkwardness, yelling, and fistfights that are sure to follow, here are some ideas to keep yourself sane.
These are not perfect and some are not even practical, but if it lessons the amount of time you have to hear about the election, the better.
1) Turn the volume way up on the football game
Put TVs all over and turn the game way up. Distraction is key and football can do the trick. Be sure to turn the volume way up as the Redskins are playing – and there are sure to be plenty of hot takes about the team’s name from your guests.
2) Set up two eating areas
Put a red tablecloth on one and a blue on another. People will figure it out. Then you can watch and laugh as the blue table spends all their time making sure everyone gets their fair share of food while the richest guy at the red table eats everything while those around him hope for some crumbs to trickle down.
3) Leave
If you are going to someone else’s house, bring some Tupperware, sneak some food into it, then discreetly and quietly sneak the hell out before everyone sits down to eat and argue with each other about “draining the swamp”.
4) Show up drunk
You might pass out or you might be asked to leave. Either way you won’t have to listen to your Uncle’s take on that wall he knows “for damn sure Mexico is paying for”.
5) Cancel it
If all else fails. Just tell everyone you can’t go to or host Thanksgiving dinner because you got the Zika and then just go to Vegas for the weekend.
Good luck.
